I wonder...

I wonder if one of my New Year's resolutions to think about this blog more will happen.

I wonder if thinking and then actually writing on my blog will occur.

I wonder if our computer is fixed. (You see, this time I have had an actual, legitimate excuse for not writing!)

I wonder if you knew that 6 years and one day ago (see above for the reason I didn't write this yesterday) I was in labor. It was not an enjoyable experience. As I thought back about it yesterday, I remembered the sweating, the crying, the machine pumping out the epidural medication breaking. Twice. I also remembered the large number of things hooked and taped to various parts of my body.

Side note, oh medical tape--I wonder why hasn't someone invented medical tape that works like a post- it. Stays on when you need it, comes of nicely when you don't, rather than ripping all of your hair off your body. I came for a baby, not a wax!

Anyway, I also wonder if my hands shoving as hard as they could on my stomach in a desperate attempt to push G out from the outside as well as the inside actually helped. Or, was I just trying to force her to follow my timeline? Making her do something this instant when if I had given her another moment or two she would have done it on her own? You all know where this is going. I have a stuborn child. She was (and is) worth every second of pain. I'm finding, however, that if I am calm, she is calm. When I push, she pushes back. So this year my other New Year's Resolution is to chose patience. Patience instead of hustling. Patience instead of yelling. Patience instead of talking through clenched teeth. Patience. I wonder if it will work.

What's in there??

So. Many things happened over Thanksgiving, some that were lots of fun, some that do not belong out here in the internets, some that make me sad so I cover them up with sarcasm and some pretty random. But I feel I must tell you about a little adventure we had just before Thanksgiving. Since we were hosting and housing several folks we wanted to make sure the house was tidy-rific for all our guests. Now I love my house and I want it to always be tidy. However, the sloth in me usually wins when tidy and resting are competing for my attention. But it was time for turning over a new leaf (i.e. COMPANY IS COMING IT'S TIME TO PANIC!!). Our old vacuum had gone to farm where it could run and chase rabbits and be happy(not really, but you know what I mean) so I headed out to our local big box store for a new one. As I reviewed my options I decided I didn't want to deal with any more vacuum bags since we have what seems like hundreds of them floating around in our garage so I bought a bagless vacuum. With a clear cover on the little thing that collects everything your vacuum sucks up. Um. Hello. Did I mention sloth? Also, my little town is super dusty. Also, we live across the street from a field, made up primarily of garbanzo beans, wheat and dust. Clearly this was a mistake.

Now, I may be dating myself and some of my fair readers here, but does anyone remember Biore strips?? They were those little band aid sized strips you would moisten, put on your nose and then peel off once they dried. The purpose of the Biore strip was to clear your pores and remove blackheads, but really, who are we kidding? The biggest part of the Biore strip adventure was doing it with friends and then grossing each other out by looking at everyone's nasty, blackheady results. Let's just say my bagless vacuum experience was like a giant Biore strip. Ack! Oh the humanity! I actually sat on that carpet! My children on occasion slept on that carpet! And wow-there was a lot to see in that clear section! I had to clean the suction part three times! It was too much! Yet oddly satisfying. In a creepy sense. I know. I need help. I'm also just ever-so-slightly tempted to wait (and wait and wait) before vacuuming again so I can have the same satisfying experience. At least that's the excuse my sloth side is going with at the moment.

Gobble gobble

Hello hello! I wonder when I will be able to post without feeling the need to greet you (all 3.2 readers of mine). Clearly, it's not today--so hello!

Just hanging out at home, waiting for P to finish his homework, listening to Christmas carols and trying to decide what to make with the leftovers from any of the 4 (!) turkeys we've cooked and frozen in 2 cup servings over the last month. OK, so the first one was because I'm retentive and had to practice cooking a turkey before we hosted Thanksgiving. And the second one was because I didn't really like the first recipe after all. The third was for the real Thanksgiving and the fourth was because, well, turkeys were on sale and I can't resist a sale. Oh how I do love a bargain! And turkeys are cheap this time of year!

Although, I just did some rough math in my head (which is tricky for me, just ask the 15 people who came to my house for Thanksgiving and found only 13 chairs. Whoops! Even with all 15 people in front of me I kept coming up with only 13. But enough about that...) Anywho, I did some rough math and even if the turkey was $.26/lb I'm not totally sure it was a bargain by the time I add in the price of the brine (salt, honey and vegetable broth) and/or the cost of the fresh rosemary and sage that was put in the turkey and/or the price of the gas to run the oven for 3 1/2 hours. Almost forgot to add the cost of the heat when I had to open all the windows and doors (letting the toasty 36 degree F wind blow through the house) to clear the smoke out during the first 30 minutes of searing the skin. I think since those heating costs get put in a different category in my budget we'll just leave that out... Sort of reminds me when MD suggested we could save a ton of money on our grocery bill if we just ate out more. Ha!

Off to check on the homework--have a great day everyone!

Update--had to share before I explode!

Number of grandparents at our house: 3
Number of nights they stayed: 4
Number of times they left to go to shopping, to a sporting event or to a bar: 7
Number of times I heard the phrase “No, no, we’ll stay here with the kids—you and MD go out and have fun: 0

Good news/bad news

Bad news: Unfortunately, the vomiting began on Thursday.
Good news: It happened while MD was still at home with P so he got to clean it up!

Bad news: We had a couple of really bad freezes last week which destroyed a bunch of fruits and vegetables at our CSA (Community Sponsored Agriculture) program, and at other places where we get fresh fruits and veggies.
Good news: The apple orchard needed people to come and get the fruit off the trees (it's fine to eat, but won't last in long term storage) so they let us pick it for free!

Good news: G is quite a good little apple picker.
Bad news: I had almost 50 pounds of apples to deal with TODAY!

Good news: We roasted potatoes and garlic for dinner tonight (they were so, so good!) and figured, since we were roasting the garlic, why not roast all 15 heads we had from the CSA.
Second good news: we now have 93 (oh yes, you know I counted each and every one) roasted cloves of garlic freezing which will be so yummy and handy to use later this fall.
Bad news: I'm not sure my hands will ever smell normal again.

Good news: I got to sleep in today! The four of us went for a walk around campus yesterday, collecting leaves for G's class--it was tender to see P helping G collect them. I got new clothes yesterday! I watched The Proposal with two friends yesterday--fun movie and it was wonderful chatting with them!
Bad news: can't really think of anything for the moment! (Superstitiously knocking on wood right now.)

How are you guys? Is your world seen as good news/bad news? Is the glass half empty or half full? Taking it day by day? Or saying "Bring it!!"? Hope everyone is great!

Well, well, well, posting two days in a row--don't worry I won't let it go to my head! Here's what's happening at our place:

Tonight I picked P up for flag football and noticed he was looking a little tired. We got to the van and I offered him a snack, which he refused. Hello spidey-senses, commence tingling now! On the way to practice I said, you seem a little tired, are you feeling OK? A sad "no" was the answer. In classic mom fashion, I pulled out the big guns, the sure-fire way to know if this is a ploy for sympathy or the real thing, "Well, maybe you shouldn't go to football tonight...should I take you home so you can rest instead?" His reply, "I am pretty tired, could you take me home?" Gulp. Totally not the answer I was expecting! This is not a test, I repeat, this is not a test!

So we went home where he fell asleep and all of the errands I had planned to take care of while he was at practice will just wait another day. Three hours later, and he's upstairs still resting quietly. If he starts throwing up, I'm really going to regret the tomato soup I gave him for dinner.

G got a piggy bank over the weekend. It's ceramic, and a lovely shade of blue. Not as lovely as the purple one she picked out first. The last purple one in the store. Did I mention it's ceramic? And the floors of the store are really, really hard? Can you all see where this is going? Oh yes, as she was carefully putting it into the bag it slipped. And crashed. For a brief moment everything in the store went silent. Then the crying began. Finally (and yes I just edited about 10 minutes of crying from this story--hey, it's my story write your own if you want the full details) she pulled herself together and picked a new one. She named it Martha Stewart, despite my suggestion of "Money Penny." Tonight she asked me the following question: "Mom, why is it that I only have coins and no cash?" I suggested she talk with her dad about that, because he seems to have the same complaint.

Finally, I had to tell G that she is not allowed to kiss anyone at school. Boy or girl. Her reply to the new rule, "but I LOVE him sooooo much!!" Pay no attention to the fact that she's 5. Oh my praying friends, say one for me--I'm going to need it!

Obsess much?

OMG peeps--it's been so long! Did you think I feel into a giant Twilight coma? A giant Twilight canyon? A giant Twilight black hole? Well, sort of. I have to be honest here--I've been reading these re-donkulous books too much of late. And quite frankly, it's been making me do a lot of thinking--no, not about Bella and Edward and Jacob. More so about my obsessive nature. Back in the day (I refer to it as my "former life") I had a job that I loved. It was not just a job, it was almost my entire identity. It was what I did during the day and talked about at night. There were times I actually felt embarrassed because they were paying me, rather than me paying them!

Then I got a new boss. And while I still loved my job it was maybe only for 2 hours a day--and I hated it the rest of the time. This boss slowly killed the joy I felt. I became super stressed. I became bitter. I pushed that bitterness onto everyone in my workplace. I was a boss of others, and I killed their joy. MD and I created an account at the bank called the “F@#K You Man” account so someday I could shout that and walk out. I would stare at meeting agendas and think to myself I could just write “I quit” on the top and be done with this. Do you have a full sense of my sad, angry, unpleasant self at the time?

But I wasn’t always like this. You see for a little while each day I was happy, because I was obsessed with a popular TV show. I would go home at lunch, watch the recording and feel like that gave me enough surrogate happiness to survive the next 5 hours at work. Then, after dinner I would watch two more episodes which allowed me to actually sleep rather than replay the day’s events over and over, and get more upset about them as the night ticked away. Oh I loved that show. I could quote 95% of the episodes, I cried over relationships that ended on the show, I’d get worried at certain spots (despite knowing how it was going to end). Simply put, I was crazy. I was obsessed. And that’s how I feel about these Twilight books right now. I feel like I’m reading them to escape something, but I can’t figure out what I need to be away from. I’m happy. I like my job. I love my kids. I love MD. I have fun friends, some who are (thankfully) close and others who may be far away but feel like they’re still close. I even love where I live. So what’s the problem? I just don’t know, but I find myself at the end of the day focusing inward, reading a book rather than reaching out or updating my blog thingy. So for now, I’m going to try to find a better balance. I’ll let you know how it goes!

P.S. There seem to be a lot of “I” statements in this post, sorry about that. Obsess much? Obsess much about myself? I think so!